Shooblivion: The Insider's Report
by PFTones3482
Summary: And by insider, we mean Howard Weinerman. Takes place during "Living in Shooblivion" (spoilers). Howard's inner thoughts during Randy's battle with the robo-dog, and what he thinks when he finally realizes why Randy is getting his butt whooped. One-Shot.


**This takes place during the episode "Living in Shooblivion" and is basically Howard's inner thoughts during the battle. Some of it is dialogue from the actual show, but after the line break is where I take over. Spoilers! **

**I thought this was a super cute episode, and it can really show how bullying and name calling can affect you negatively. And then we have Howard, who we see go through an inner battle about what's wrong with his best friend until he figures it out.**

**I don't own Randy Cunningham.**

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GENERAL POV

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Howard Weinerman wasn't all that used to getting along with his sister. But when they did get along, he was generally pleased with the outcome. Such as the Scarf Center that he and Heidi had started in order to joke around about the ninja's catchphrases and fighting technique.

He glanced back at the screen that was currently behind him and Heidi, grimacing slightly as Randy was chucked into the school through a window by a massive robot dog that he assumed Viceroy had designed.

As soon as the dog had thrown him, he began panting and spinning in circles. Howard had to hand it to Viceroy, this dog was…well, dog like.

But he couldn't help but be a tiny bit concerned about Randy. Typically when he got thrown, the ninja would throw his scarf out and try to swing back into battle in seconds. But it had been nearly two minutes, and Randy had yet to reappear from the building.

Howard pushed his chair back and paced over to a large window, jumping slightly as Bucky was chucked against it by the robo dog. "Hm. I hope Ninja's okay," he murmured, turning back to Heidi.

"The numbers are in!" his sister shouted, spinning her computer screen around to show him a bunch of graphs that Howard didn't really want to take the time to read. "Robo hound puts scar center's views through the woof!"

Howard ignored the terrible pun and brought a finger to his chin, contemplating. "Hmmmm, now I'm conflicted," he muttered, more to himself than anyone else. "On one hand, ninja's missing, on the other hand…."

"We have more views than Prawn Stars!" Heidi interrupted in excitement.

Howard grinned in delight. "The other hand!" he yelped, throwing his fists in the air.

As he and Heidi read over the reviews, Howard began chewing on his lip. Was he worried about Randy? Maybe. He knew that the ninja could handle himself, but something had been off about his fighting earlier.

Howard zoned out a little as Heidi continued blabbering about their ratings. Was Randy okay? How much damage could a McFist bot really do to him? Did he want to know?

The bell blared for lunch and Howard shook himself out of his trance, bidding Heidi goodbye as he darted to the cafeteria, hoping deep down that Randy would show up.

He burst through the doors and stood in the cafeteria for a moment, scanning the faces until he landed on the familiar purple haired boy. Breathing a small sigh of relief, Howard strolled over to him. "There he is, Cunningham! Where have you been?" he demanded, giving him a once over and pulling him into a hug. "I was worried!"

"You were?" Randy asked in surprise.

Howard immediately backtracked, knowing that he didn't really show a soft side all that often. "Can't have the center without the scarf!" he quickly substituted, throwing his hand out to show that Heidi had set up their broadcasting table in the cafeteria.

He glanced sideways at Randy as everyone began chanting shoob at the top of their lungs. "So say the jackanapes," his dark haired friend muttered.

Howard nearly questioned him on the bizarre insult (at least, that's what he thought it was) but at that moment the robo hound burst through the cafeteria wall. Howard smirked. "Show time!" he called over his shoulder as he ran to sit next to Heidi.

He sat down and glanced up, scanning the crowds for Cunningham and finding him under a table, his face filled with-was that fear? Randy wasn't afraid of being the ninja. Howard frowned slightly and scooted into the table, tugging on his jacket.

Seconds later, a smoke bomb surrounded the table and Randy appeared on top of it. Howard sighed in slight relief, perking his ears up as Heidi began speaking.

"He's back, Ninj-fans!" the girl cried.

"Let him hear it!" Howard yelped, throwing a fist in the air, certain that Randy liked the attention he was getting out of all of this.

As the crowd began chanting "shoob" at the ninja, Howard frowned, his eyes narrowing slightly as Randy began swatting the air around his head, grumbling under his breath. What was going on?

The dog leapt up and barked at the ninja, sending him flying backwards and into a wall. Howard bit back a yelp on his tongue, hard, as Randy sat up and put a hand to his head. Something was definitely up.

Robo hound jumped again and tossed Randy back into the kitchen and into a pot of what was maybe chili, causing Howard to hiss under his breath. "Randy, what the juice?" he muttered to himself, his eyes searching his friend in worry as the ninja buried his head in his hands.

The ninja was tossed up and into the ceiling and Howard flinched. "Oooh. Yikes," he muttered, shielding his eyes as Randy hit the floor again, hard enough to leave a dent.

When he hit the soda machine without even fighting back, Howard knew that Randy was being effected by something. Whether it was the sorcerer, the book, or something else, the orange haired boy didn't know, but he did know that if it wasn't stopped, Randy was going to get really hurt.

"We are witness to the most tragic Ninj-trosity of all time," Heidi declared. "Could this be the end?"

She looked to Howard and the boy grimaced, looking around as the students began chanting "shoob" once more.

As his eyes scanned the kids, chanting the word that he and Randy typically used to insult people, the word that made you sound like an idiot, it dawned on him that being called a shoob while trying to save people was probably not the best motivator.

_That's why Cunningham's wonking up, _Howard thought to himself, glancing over at Randy. _It's my fault. _"Whoa, whoa, whoa guys, all right, let's dial it down a little, shoob's supposed to be a funny thing," he said feebly.

None of his classmates listened; in fact, Howard could swear that they were getting louder, and he winced, looking back at Randy in time to see the boy get smacked out of a pile of soda cans and into one of the walls. He squinted an eye shut, biting on his thumb. That had to hurt.

He watched again as Randy was flung onto a lunch table and slid directly into the leg of S. Ward Smith. The boy shook his head and pushed back from his chair, darting over to the table in time to hear Mr. Smith call Randy a "Clee-claw," whatever that was.

"Hey," he said sincerely, leaning up against the table and looking back at Randy. "Are you okay? Do you want us to stop the shoob chant?"

Randy waved a hand at him. "No. Chant all you want. I'm done listening."

Howard paused, watching as Randy leapt over him. "Good, cause I tried to stop 'em, and that was _not _happening."

He got back to his seat just in time to see Randy's face go cross eyed, the face he made when he had solved the problem, and he grinned as Heidi squealed. "Double Dip, there's the face!" she cried out.

Howard smiled cheekily. "Inside sources tell me that's the face he makes when he puts it all together."

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After school ended, Howard darted from class and leaned lazily next to Randy's locker, glancing up as the boy walked over, walking with a barely noticeable limp. Howard grimaced slightly and glanced away.

"Listen, Cunningham, I'm really sorry about the whole shoob thing," he said with a shrug, biting his lip. "If I had realized that it would affect you that badly, I would have told Heidi it was a bad idea."

Randy stopped and stared at his friend in shock. He had _never _gotten that sincere of an apology before from Howard. Sure he had complimented his ninja-ing, or admitted that he was wrong, but it was always followed with a sarcastic comment. The fact that he wasn't being sarcastic now implied that he had been genuinely freaked out. "Howard, it's all good," he promised, twisting his combination together and opening his locker.

Howard shrugged slowly. "If you say so," he said, crinkling his eyebrows together. "Just…next time something I do is bothering you that badly, tell me, okay?"

He looked up at Randy, his eyes filled with concern, and Randy smiled gently. "I promise, buddy."

Howard nodded and glanced down at the floor again. Randy tilted his head and shut his locker, swinging his backpack over his shoulder. "Hey. You okay?" the ninja asked.

The boy glanced up carefully, studying his friend. No. Howard wasn't okay. He had almost gotten his best friend seriously injured, maybe worse, for some dumb show that didn't even matter. He had watched Randy get thrown into a countless number of walls and floors and ceilings over the months, but it was worse this time because it was his fault.

If it hadn't been for Howard, Randy could have beaten that dog in a matter of minutes. Howard knew that. And he felt guiltier than he could ever say.

"Howard?" Randy asked again, putting a hand on his shoulder and shaking Howard from his inner self beating. "You okay?"

Howard bit his lip and shifted his backpack before giving Randy a quick hug, pulling back almost instantly and grunting. "Yeah…yeah. Hey Cunningham?"

Randy blinked in surprise and tilted his head, not used to the sudden kindness. "Yeah?"

Howard frowned and looked down, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm sorry, and I'm glad you're okay."

Randy's eyebrows shot up slightly but he clapped Howard on the back, leading him out of the school building. "Hey man, it's all good. It was just a doggy dog day," he said with a grin, knowing it would get his friend back to normal.

Howard groaned and threw his arms up in the air as they started down the street.

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**Awwwww Howard. He's so adorable. I want to squish him.**

**Again I say, watch as much Randy Cunningham as possible! It's really good and not getting as much publicity or views as it needs. And NO, it's NOT because it's on Disney XD instead of Disney Channel. If that were the case, Gravity Falls wouldn't be one of the highest rated TV shows of all time, Phineas and Ferb would have ended months ago, and Star vs. the Forces of Evil wouldn't be getting so much positive feedback. **

**It's not the channel that's the problem, it's that it isn't advertised as much and there is virtually no merchandise for it. So please, please, please watch it, buy the episodes on iTunes or Google Play, and keep being bruce!**

**Review please!**


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